It seems I've tried a few times to get this blog up and running, and trying to post on a regular basis. It just wasn't happening. Maybe I had to much in my life at the time, or maybe I just posted all my good stuff on Facebook? No matter. I have something to post about now and I'm going to try to keep it up.
Yesterday was my first day of college. It felt like where I belonged. I even came home from my first day and did all of my math homework. I hate math, especially algebra, but I did it and I felt like I actually accomplished something. I like both of my instructors and I have two more to meet. I'm sure I'm going to like them too.
So why college? Why now?
This summer, I went back to Charleston where I had been living when our son passed away. I went back to the hospital where he had died and made my peace with the world once and for all. It was the final thing I needed to do for myself to move on to my last phase of grief. Shortly after we came back, I turned 41.
One night, I was working at the store frying a 30 pound box of bacon. It was hot in the kitchen, I was tired and feeling sorry for myself. I came to the conclusion that there was more to my life than standing in a hot kitchen frying bacon. Sure, I made light of it all, joking about it on Facebook, but deep down, I couldn't continue to live that life. I barely made above minimum wage and my family was suffering right along with me. Life had to change.
I went into counseling and started antidepressants (I have major depressive disorder and anxiety). I looked hard at my life and found that I've always wanted to work in the medical field and with kids. I also wanted to make a difference in someones care. It didn't take long to decide I wanted to be a respiratory therapist and that I want to specialize in neonatal and pediatrics.
My son had many wonderful people that took care of him and some that should not have been around kids at all. The two that really stick in my mind that gave him sub-par care were both respiratory therapists. In doing my research in a career, I found that RTs only get about 3 credit hours out of their entire college education learning about pediatric airways. I figured since I can change a trach with one hand while hanging upside down that I was more than qualified to sway the pendulum the other direction and become a GREAT pediatric RT. I will keep you posted on how it's going.
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